A life of travel, shameless gluttony, hedonism and occasional enslavement

With a name like that, you’d be expecting a place serving dishes lovingly created from the most delectable parts of the pig.  Not to be confused with Au Pied de Cochon in Montreal, Canada, which is a foodie’s paradise, or so I heard.  This Au Pied de Cochon in Paris, a short walk from Forum Les Halles, is seriously bad.  Now, why would you want to read a blog post about bad Parisian food?

Thats because it is so common in Paris to get really bad food at bistros that promise the authentic ‘French’ experience.  To get really good food is to book way in advance for the most famous places like Chez L’Ami Jean, or La Regalade or the Frenchie.  Have never eaten at these places before as getting a table is difficult unless your travel plans to Paris have been sewn up long in advance.

Shoddy research resulted in being misled by an article which spoke about my dream and touched my heart. “Famous onion soup, specialty grilled pig’s feet…St Antoine’s tempation of Pig’s tail, snout, foot and chitterlings….” 

Famous French Onion soup, caramelised onions in beef broth, topped with croutons and a generous layer of Gruyere cheese.  Sounds awesome right?

The promising look of the soup in its ramekin quickly showed its disappointing face with a plunge of the spoon.  What should have been a rich brown broth was an insipid soup the colour of tea.  You could taste it just by seeing it, and what should have been the rich, umami-laden flavour of the beef broth and caramelised onions gave way instead to Bisto.

 That is, beef stock cubes, which bear more relation to washing detergent than it does to bovine piss. It seemed to taste like bisto + lots of salt + addition msg + a bit of onion, of which it was just slightly browned, instead of caramelised.  I would sooner open a can of Campbell’s soup than drink this one.

To say I was excited about the Tete de Cochon coming next would have been an exaggeration, considering the farcical ‘famous French Onion Soup.’  In a small pot, came a soupy melange of root vegetables and various pig parts.

Snout, ear, jowel, eye socket fat and all the requisite pig head parts were there, but there was no flavour.  In total contrast to the salty, inedible soup, this dish was apparently meant to be savoured ‘au naturel’, that is, lacking in flavour.  How they managed to make a pig’s head flavourless is beyond me, but some star chef at the back responsible for this should seriously consider an apprenticeship with a Charcutier to pay a pig some proper respect.

Why the hell would you bother to turn a potato (See picture above) in the classical style and yet, churn out a dish devoid of flavour?  This is just an example of the many horrible eating places in Paris where tourist traps abound.  

Falling into one headfirst means that next time, to play safe in bistros of unknown repute, I’ll just have steak frites, with the steak cooked au bleu.  That means its barely cooked, merely browned on the surface.  That should almost guarantee that I will never have to eat a steak tough enough to make tyres with.

Stay away from this place, you’ve been warned!